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🔗 Big Changes for Marriage and Divorce in South Africa

FJ Snijman

By FJ Snijman - He writes about divorce, electronics, passive income, ZX14R, local SEO and small businesses
April 22, 2025

🧠 Introduction: The Changing Face of Marriage

South Africa's perception of marriage is undergoing a seismic shift. No longer a youthful milestone, marriage is now a strategic life decision often delayed for career, financial stability, and personal growth. With updated figures from Stats SA, it's clear that the marriage blueprint is being rewritten.

🕰 Shifting Timelines: Why South Africans Marry Later

Career and Education First

With increased access to higher education and professional growth, young South Africans are prioritizing their future over early romantic commitments. Many are choosing to first establish careers before entering long-term unions.

  • Median groom age: Increased from 35 (2014) to 38 (2023)
  • Median bride age: Increased from 31 (2014) to 34 (2023)

This delay reflects a shift in values, where building individual identity and financial independence trumps early coupling.

Personal Growth Over Partnership

There's a rising cultural narrative emphasizing self-fulfillment and personal journeys. The belief that a strong individual makes a better partner later in life is now mainstream thinking. This has a direct impact on the average age of first-time marriages, pushing it into the early-to-mid 30s.

📊 Stats SA: Marriage Trends from 2014 to 2023

Median Ages on the Rise

Stats SA's latest report confirms what society already suspects—people are getting married later than ever before.

Year Median Groom Age Median Bride Age
2014 35 31
2023 38 34

The trend is clear—South Africans are waiting longer to marry, with a growing gap between the traditional and modern timelines.

Civil vs. Customary Marriages: The Legal Landscape

South Africa recognizes different marriage types:

  • Civil Marriages
  • Customary Marriages
  • Civil Unions

Here's the breakdown for 2023:

Marriage Type Count
Civil Marriages 99,289
Customary Marriages 3,537
Civil Unions 2,297
Total 105,123

The data paints a picture of a society still engaging in formal unions, though the volume is dwindling.

📉 Declining Marriage Rates: The Numbers Don't Lie

Civil Marriages See a 34.2% Drop

Over the last decade, civil marriages dropped from 150,852 (2014) to 99,289 (2023)—a 34.2% decline.

Customary Unions Also Decline

The figures for customary marriages also took a knock, falling by 19.2% from 2014 levels.

This decline raises questions about the relevance of marriage in modern society and whether legal commitment holds the same weight it once did.

👫 Who Marries Whom? Age and Gender Patterns

Age Gaps and Trends in Civil Marriages

In civil marriages:

  • 75.2% of grooms are older than their brides.
  • 16.1% married older women.
  • 8.6% married someone the same age.

Customary Marriage Dynamics

In customary marriages:

  • 87.1% of grooms were older than their brides.
  • Median ages were higher than in civil or civil union categories.

These patterns reflect enduring cultural preferences about age and marital dynamics.

💍 First-Timers vs. Remarriages

New Love Takes the Lead

Despite the decline, most unions remain first-time marriages:

  • 80.3% of grooms
  • 85.2% of brides

Gender Differences in Remarriage Rates

Stats show that men are more likely to remarry:

  • 4.3% of divorced men
  • 2.8% of divorced women
  • Widowers (0.5%) vs widows (0.4%)

The data suggests social and economic reasons behind gendered remarriage trends.

⚖️ The Rise in Divorce Cases

Divorce Rate Up by 10.1% in 2023

In 2023:

  • 22,230 divorces finalized.
  • Up from 20,196 in 2022.

This is the largest annual increase in recent years and a sign that marriage stability is declining.

When Marriages Break: Timing Patterns

42% of divorces occur within the first 10 years of marriage, suggesting early marital challenges remain common.

📅 Age and Gender in Divorce

Divorce Peaks at Ages 40–44

The highest number of divorces occurred in the 40–44 age group.

Who Files First—Men or Women?

Women under 45 are more likely to initiate divorce, while men take the lead post-45.

Age Group More Likely to File
Under 45 Women
Over 45 Men

This reflects generational shifts in relationship dynamics and expectations.

👶 Divorce and Children: The Hidden Impact

Over Half of Divorces Involve Kids Under 18

In 2023, 55.1% of divorces involved children. This raises concerns about:

  • Emotional impact on minors
  • Custody and support battles
  • Long-term effects on future relationships

🧠 Cultural and Social Impacts of Delayed Marriage

Independence Over Conformity

Younger generations are rejecting the "settle down early" model. Instead, they embrace personal autonomy, cohabitation, and flexible relationships.

Evolving Views on Commitment

Marriage is no longer a necessity—it's a choice. With that choice comes a deeper analysis of compatibility, purpose, and timing.

🔮 What These Trends Mean for the Future

More Cohabitation, Less Formal Union

We can expect:

  • Rise in cohabitation
  • More civil unions over religious weddings
  • Partnerships based on mutual goals, not tradition

Legal Systems May Need to Evolve

With fewer formal marriages, lawmakers may need to address:

  • Cohabitation rights
  • Shared property laws
  • Custody without formal marriage

✅ Key Takeaways

  • South Africans are marrying later, focusing on career and personal goals.
  • Marriage rates are falling, while divorce is rising—especially in the 40–44 age group.
  • Gender trends show men remarry more often, and women initiate more divorces under 45.
  • Over half of divorces involve children, prompting deeper societal concerns.
  • Cultural shifts reflect a growing desire for personal freedom and relationship redefinition.

❓ Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

1. Why are South Africans getting married later?

Many prioritize education, careers, and personal growth before committing to long-term partnerships.

2. What is the average age for marriage in South Africa now?

As of 2023, the median age is 38 for grooms and 34 for brides.

3. Are divorce rates increasing in South Africa?

Yes, divorces rose by 10.1% in 2023, with most happening within the first decade of marriage.

4. What role does age play in divorce trends?

People between 40–44 years are most affected, with more women initiating divorce under 45.

5. Are customary marriages declining too?

Yes, customary marriages declined by 19.2% over the last decade, similar to civil unions.

6. Do most divorces affect children?

Yes, 55.1% of divorces involve children under the age of 18.

🔗 External Link & References

Stats SA Marriage and Divorce Report 2023

🏁 Conclusion

South Africa is in the midst of a marriage revolution. Love still matters—but how, when, and why people choose to marry is evolving. Whether you're planning your wedding or rethinking commitment altogether, understanding these shifts will help you navigate your own path in a changing society.